Women are Attracted to Healthy Egos, Not Egocentricity

In most societies, it’s the man with strong ego who catches women’s attention. Other more meek guys may have just as many accomplishments, but if they don’t project confidence, women pass them over for the big ego men. Self confidence and a healthy ego in a man signals to women that he’s in charge of his life. He’s not afraid to pursue what he wants and he won’t be pushed around.

The confident man seems like he has it all, or if he doesn’t have it all quite yet, he has the ambition, the determination and the skills to take control and make it happen. Many women are hoping and looking for a man to build a life with or just go out and have fun with who will be a capable decision maker and active partner in decisions great and small. A man with a healthy ego looks like a man who will be there when she needs a helping hand or bit of advice. It’s funny though considering The Concise Oxford Dictionary defines ‘ego’ as ‘the conscious thinking self’ – so women then in effect like guys who actively think about themselves! It’s crazy, shouldn’t they it be those that are thinking about others that are attractive?!

Women don’t like egocentric men, however. An egocentric man may at first seem competent and often even more assertive than even the man with the healthy ego. Egocentricity can make a man seem larger than life. He’s likely to brag about his daring adventures, his big deals, or his new car. He’ll rush in and sweep a woman off her feet, but she’ll soon grow annoyed and disillusioned with the egocentric man.

Egocentricity can be a very selfish trait. If a man is always talking about himself and his accomplishments, he probably has no time to listen to woman talk about herself. Worse yet, he may constantly belittle her accomplishments in comparison to his. Astute women read this as insecurity, and few things are as disappointing to women as insecure men. If every conversation is all about him, women will eventually flee.

Too much ego can lead to over-controlling behavior, which women often fear. Women of today have much more autonomy than in previous eras. They want to be consulted in decisions and be treated like partners in relationships, not like subordinates. A woman dealing with an egocentric man may feel that her needs are constantly ignored or secondary to his, and will feel resentful and under-appreciated. While the egocentric man feels that he’s simply taking charge, to others this behavior is selfish and out of control.

The huge difference between the guy with the healthy ego and the guy full of egocentricity is that the man with the healthy ego doesn’t have to have the spotlight of attention on him at every moment to feel valuable. A man with a healthy ego can afford to be generous with compliments. He’s not threatened by other people’s accomplishments. Women appreciate a man who is secure enough to give them attention and approval. Egocentricity neediness is especially unattractive to women with healthy egos of their own. Women are attracted to men who value themselves. They’re not attracted to men whose egos are so large that there’s no space for anyone else in their regard.