Tag: Family Guy

Lois: Brian, you’re not wearing that sweater I made you. Brian: Well, y’know it’s a little warm in here… Lois: Don we now our gay apparel! Brian: It doesn’t get much gayer than this. Chris: Dad you should invent the frisbee, that’s an awesome toy. Meg: Chris, the frisbee is already invented. Chris: Then how…

Tom Tucker: Well Diane, there’s something you’re gonna have to get use to. Men running away from you. Diane Simmons: Shut up Tom, you’re so far in the closet you’re finding Christmas presents. Trisha Takanawa: For many, this charred portrait of Elizabeth II gives poignant new meaning to the phrase, “Hey check out that flaming…

Chris: When I stick this army guy with the sharp bayonet up my nose, it tickles my brain. Hah ha ha…. ow. Oh, now I don’t know math. Brian: I would take my sweater off too, but I think it’s attached to my skin. Lois: Kids your grandfathers ears are not gross and they are…

Peter: First of all Bonnie, you have been pregnant for like 6 years! Are you gonna have the baby or not? Meg: I can’t believe my stupid parents are going to follow around stupid old KISS, it’s painful. Peter: Not half as painful as a tire iron upside your head. Meg: What? Peter: I’ll miss…

Trisha Takanawa: Diane, I am standing outside that Park Barrington Hotel because they don’t allow Asians inside. Joe: Maybe Peter took the trophy, he wanted it all along. Peter: I couldn’t have taken in, I was to busy breakin’ into Joe’s garage stealin’ his ladder so I could steal the trophy tonight. Lois: Peter! Peter:…

Tom Tucker: A bit of breaking news. A local family is forced out of their home by ghosts. Who are they going to call? Diana Simmons: (sighs): Ghostbusters, Tom. Tom Tucker: No, Diane. Their insurance company. That’s just stupid what you said. Social Worker: “Glen honey, I got a question for you. What do you…