Sexy Sunday 26

20061114-gemma_atkinson_hq_02

Gemma Atkinson

So Nice I will add her Twice.

Gemma Atkinson was born in Bury, Manchester England in 1984. During her high school years she was very popular and participated in many school sports. Gemma was more interested in sports then modeling or acting but her mother secretly tricked her into her first audition. In 2001 she was cast for the role of Lisa Hunter on the TV series Holly Oaks. Gemma has become a female sex symbol and has had a lot of magazine exposure from posing for Arena, Zoo Weekly, Maxim, and loaded. In 2008 she was cast for the role in Boogie Woogie along side Heather Graham.

Hair is the Hat

Hair is the hatAbsolutely no question about it. This guy is my favorite person in the world this week, probably next week and most likely the week after that as well. His name is Darain Housen and that hat sitting on top of his head is his real hair. I shit you not.

Not only does he have the flyest hair style EVER, but he’s Jamaican and he talks like this in explaining how his hair-hat came to be; “Mi an dem fi go a di party but di three of them had caps an’ mi had none so mi get two mirror one behind mi and di other in front of mi an’ mi trim mi hair like a cap an’ go a di dance”

You can say that again, but probably not five times fast.

For 20 years Housen has worn his cap o’ hair and one has to wonder if his hat is – pardon the pun – hair to stay.

View the full Jamaican Star Story here http://www.jamaica-star.com/thestar/20051006/news/news1.html

Sexy Sunday 25

Pamela Anderson_1

Pamela Anderson

Pamela Anderson was born in Ladysmith British Columbia in 1967. She earned the name of the “Centennial Baby” because she was the first baby born on Canada’s 100th birthday. In 1989 Pamela attended a CFL game and appeared on the jumbotron screen wearing a Labatt tee. The crowd went wild for her and she was offered a modeling contract from Labatt. Due to the popularity she gained from her modeling career she was offered a chance e to model for Playboy. Pamela would soon make TV appearances with a small role on Married With Children, Home Improvement, and eventually Bay Watch. In 96 she had accepted her first movie role in “Barb Wire” against the advice of her Agent. However she should have listened because the movie bombed at the Box office. One of the events that have given Pamela lots of attention is her relationship with Motley Crue’s Tommy Lee. Within 4 days of meeting the drummer the two wed. The two appeared in a homemade sex tape that had allegedly been stolen from the house and posted on the net. The two had divorced shortly after the birth of their first child but got back together and had their second son. She has since been romantically tied to Marcus Schenkenberg, and Kid Rock. In 2002 her career was put on hold when she revealed she had contracted Hepatitis C supposedly from sharing a tattoo needle with ex Tommy Lee. Since then she has written and co-written 2 books and has had brief appearances in a few films.

Alexander

Two days after I graduated from high school in ’95, I couldn’t wait to hightail it out of our small bumkin town and I did so, leaving to live for the summer with my father and his wife in Montreal.  As I arrived at Montreal’s Dorval airport my father was late for some reason or another, I can’t remember for sure why and I’m sure he wouldn’t either. This meant that I was standing alone, by myself at the carousal as my bags were virtually the last ones coming off the plane.  To this day I don’t remember anyone else still waiting for their bags as I was.  This wasn’t particularly bothersome as more often that not I’m just as happy alone as I am in the company of others if not more so, but it did lead to this encounter.

A lady somewhere in her 40’s accompanied by a gentleman probably 15 years older than she approached me and queried, “Alexander?”

At this point I was thinking that my father couldn’t make it to get me and had sent this lady to pick me up. Her having used the name Alexander I thought perhaps that she didn’t know that that wasn’t my actual name and was just rather formal.

“Sandy.” I replied back acknowledging her formal address.  She smiled as if gazing upon a long lost son.

The smile wasn’t all she had for me and proceeded to embrace me in a hug that was incredibly awkward. One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi…why am I getting aroused? Maybe she was just really good at giving strangers hugs, I wasn’t sure.

She did eventually release me at which point I was introduced her friend and then asked if I had all of my bags. Yup I was ready to go.

No mention of my father up to this point so I asked if my father had sent them to pick me up.

One of them replied, “Your father?”

“Barry?” I questioned.

The lady had a poker face of confusion if there ever was one written over her from her forehead to her toes.  Her face grew longer and more confused as the seconds ticked by.

18 years ago she had given up her son Alexander for adoption and had come to the Airport to meet with him for the first time since.  As there were no other people waiting for bags in the carousal area I can’t imagine the feelings and thoughts that that woman must have been going through at this point.

I don’t remember much more about the encounter and my father arrived very shortly afterward and away we went. I’ve always wondered what happened to Alexander. Was he in another part of the airport waiting or using the phone? Did he miss his connecting flight? Did he stand up the woman who he came into the world from and hadn’t seen him in his whole life?  Ill never know.

Later that summer as I was eating a less than hearty bowl of carrot soup at my fathers apartment I wondered how things would have played out if I had gone along for the ride, after all the woman and man as were dressed to the nines.  For the right price, I could be Alexander.

Winning in Sports is Never Easy

While winning in sports is never easy, sometimes it can look easy. One thing it is never is however is guaranteed.

Welcome to reality Ottawa Senator fans. With all your pomp and righteousness your finally learning that winning is indeed harder than it looks. Despite a first half to the regular season that had many calling Ottawa an unstoppable juggernaut and the Stanley Cup Champion in waiting, the wheels came off in the new year.

Not only did the wheels come off but the driver was thrown clear from the wreck and none of the passengers were wearing seat belts.

As a Maple Leaf fan, I absolutely love this. If I was a Senator fan reading this, my level of disgust and sickness in the pit of my stomach would be boiling over ten fold knowing their misery is my silver lining to a dreadful season. It is salt in the wounds, not necessarily ground in but definitely poured on.

Of course us Leaf fans have known how hard it is to win for ages. The Leafs have had Borje Salming and Daryl Sittler put together the majority of their Hall of Fame careers as integral members of the Maple Leafs with neither even sniffing at the cup. Wendal Clark, Doug Gilmour, Pat Burns, Curtis Joseph, Dave Andrychuk and Ed Belfour each were members of good Maple Leaf teams that never won the big one or even play for it. Felix Potvin, , Vince Damphouse, Al Iafrate, even Larry Murphy and Alexander Mogilny , No Cups in Toronto.

Vancouver fans have gone through the Pavel Bure, Kirk McLean and even the Stan Smyl years. Soon Markus Nlasland and Trevor Linden will be added to that list. The Sedins and Roberto Luongo are on deck.

It took the New York Rangers 54 years since their last cup when they won in ‘94 and they haven’t been back to the dance since. In fact they’ve been downright awful for a lot of those years.

Chicago, the last time they won a Cup, the NHL was played outside on ponds* and the goalies didn’t even wear masks to protect their faces.

Philadelphia, Boston, Minnesota,, Los Angeles, and certainly Washington fans will all tell you the same things,. Win the big one and THEN climb aboard your high horse.

Ottawa your recent existence in the NHL is still less than 20 years old and you’ve just begun your list. Zdeno Chara and Marion Hossa are a good starting pair.

Now I know there are exceptions to every rule. For every Chicago and Toronto there is a Tampa Bay, Carolina or Anaheim. To that I say, pfft, I’ll probably be dead the next time one of those three teams wins a cup again.

To Ottawa I say this; thanks for the first half and thanks for the collapse. It’s been fun.

Introduction of Sandy

Before I make any posts here on Malewail, I thought I would share a little of me with you.  A kind of get to know me, well…at least you’ll get to know my name, some thing I just did a background check on.

The name Sandy is primarily used as a shorthand name for Alexander or Alexandra.  Alexandra is sometimes shortened to Sandra as well.

I was named after an uncle and great uncle on my fathers side going back two generations and a great grandfather on my mothers side, all were named Alexander and were called Sandy in their everyday lives.

I however wasn’t named Alexander; I was named Sandy.

Do you know what the official meaning of the name Sandy?

Technically there is no meaning for Sandy.  Sandy’s official definition is that it is a nickname for Alexander, Axelia, Cassandra, Sanders, Sanford and numerous variations of Alexandra.   Sanders and Sanford are Middle English decent while the rest are Greek.  I however, am 94% Scottish.  The Hindu’s are the only culture to use the name Sandy and let on it was not derived from anywhere. The Hindu’s of course don’t have a meaning for the name either; I suppose they just liked the way it rolled off the tongue.

Of course the names Alexander and Axelia are powerful names with powerful meanings, each being that of the ‘protector of mankind’. The name Cassandra is equally intimidating as it translates to ‘Prophet of Doom’.

Using Sherlock Holmes dubbed the rules of deduction I concluded that yes the name Sandy does indeed have a definition. The ‘Prophet of Doom who is also the protector of mankind’.

Yup, I think I like the ring to that. I mean if my name officially has no meaning why I can’t give it one. The Native Indians gave themselves names and made up meanings, most of which included the meaning directly into their names themselves.

I hope I’m not over my head in this, those are some lofty expectations. I’m not even good at pro-line and now I’m expected to predict doom?

Geezus, Mary and John Hughie, maybe it should be mean ‘Giver of free smiles’. That I CAN handle.

Although if I had to foresee doom, I pick 2012.  If Nas is calling it, I won’t question.  No, not Nasty Nas, Nasir Bin Aluda Ra.  Nostradamus. Michel de Nostradame.  God speed everyone.

Sandy (Giver of Free Smiles)

Sexy Sunday 24

Charlize Theron_1

Charlize Theron

Charlize Theron was born in Benoni South Africa in 1975. As a child Charlize wanted to be in ballet but a knee injury at age 15 ended her dream. Instead she did some modeling and then decided to move to LA to pursue a career in acting. She made a brief appearance in Children of the Corn III and has since been in movies like Reindeer games, Mighty Joe Young, Hancock, and the Astronaut’s Wife to name just a couple. One role that got her big attention was in the movie “Monster” where she took on the role of a crazy man killer. Charlize is currently working on the sets of a few other movies.

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