How to be a Man

I’m tired of watching TV and not being able to remember a single sitcom where a man is considered a role model or respected. Maybe it’s the constant fighting next door, the wife screaming at the husband while he sits on the porch, head hung low like a kicked dog. Maybe it’s because my own father and grandfather were real men and knew how to live and teach by example.

So for any man who gives a damn, I have a few things to say about who you should be and how you should live. I’m not telling you what to do as a person, but as a member of the male race. So pull your balls out of your wife’s purse, shove them in your pants and read on.

True Attributes of Manhood

Lets’ get something straight, the real qualities of a man don’t come from external sources. I don’t care what kind of truck you’ve got; I can steal it, slash it, smash it and light it on fire. Real men don’t need children’s toys to prove our worth. They have an internal foundation that can’t be stolen and live by principle and example. An arrogant dick will still be an arrogant dick with or without the truck.

Know Who You Are and Stand In Your Place

This is the foundation of each and every man who can truly call himself one. A man knows his own mind and the principles he lives by. He is not a tyrant, but he is willing and able to defend himself, his loved ones and those who stand in need. At the same time, a man knows his bounds and doesn’t cross lines into another’s stewardship (man OR woman). Real men are strong and are not afraid of opposition. In fact, they thrive in such an environment.

Say What You Mean, Mean What You Say

Be clear and exact in your conversations. A man’s word is his bond, so keep your word! This is the deepest measure of your character. If you know you can’t keep your promise, don’t give it. Be the man who can be taken for face value and be counted on under all circumstances. At the same time, a man can keep a confidence; which specifically means keeping your damn mouth shut. Only say what has to be said. If you don’t know the facts, you don’t know anything.

Don’t Make Excuses

Men don’t hide behind ego or machismo, so stop making excuses for living like dogs and bottom dwellers. Have some respect for yourself and your family and get off your ass and do your duty! Provide for you family if you have one. Carve a life for yourself by using the muscle and mind you were given. Men don’t ask for handouts when work can be done and we don’t live on daddy’s money either.

Stay Focused

Men know the meaning of priority. It’s the difference between the important things in life and a whim. Guys who sit in their mother’s basement playing World of Warcraft all day long, are not men. No matter how many Horde they kill. Men have a purpose. Use your mind and do something worthwhile.

Family is the center of a man’s life, especially his children. He knows they’re a gift from God and instructs them in the ways of principle and respect. They are taught to honor their parents and especially to give respect to their mother, who their father holds most dear. A man also holds the virtue of a woman precious, just ask any dad who has a five year old daughter.

A Man Constantly Learns and Grows

We are not infallible, all powerful or all knowing. Men can, however, constantly learn and grow, developing useful skills to benefit those around them, especially his family. That means reading, carefully studying examples of his associates and applying new knowledge while in motion. A man is not afraid to make mistakes, he simply apologizes, takes responsibility for them and moves on. At the same time, a real man understands that everyone is in flux and has patience for those who also take responsibility for themselves and their choices.

In summary, a man lives life on purpose, with purpose—choosing for himself and accepting full responsibility and the consequences of his actions. A man does all he can to be a role model, to gain the respect of others through being a proper example—specifically his own children.


Stephanie Caldwell is from Salt Lake City and writes for She is a runner, reader, and writer.