(Peter and Brian are setting up a crib for the expected baby.)
Brian: Insert Rod A into Rod Support B.
Peter: That’s what she–
Brian: If you say that’s what she said one more time I’m gonna pop you.

<p class=”note”>Brian: Gosh, I’d like to help you, Peter, but I’ve got to go out into the hall and chew on the back of my ass for about five minutes.</p>

Meg: I can’t believe he’s over me!
Mort: I can’t believe I’m out 34 grand!
Peter: I can’t believe its not butter! Stick around! More Family Guy coming up!

<p class=”note”>Trisha Takanawa: Thank you, Diane. Sex. Some people have it anonymously. What kind of person would do that you might ask? Well, I’m about to find out. I’ve just picked up a complete stranger in a hotel bar and he’s in the bathroom right now, possibly doing drugs. Watch as I have sex with this potentially dangerous man, as we take you in-depth and undercover.
(Quagmire walks into the room in his boxers and lays down on the bed.)
Quagmire: I’ve never had a Spanish chick before! O-LE!!!</p>

Gun Advocate: Guns don’t kill people, dangerous minorities do.