Author: Rod PhillipsWe all want to make sex as good as it can be for our partners. But there’s more to good sex than choosing the best sex position – you have to know which sex positions and techniques to avoid! So here is a list of things for men to avoid during sex, along with some advice about the best sex positions – the ones that will make sex great for both of you!
First Sex Position Mistake: Pushing your partner to do anything she isn’t comfortable with. So, if you’ve been thinking of trying the outrageous sex positions adopted by some porn stars, forget it! Start from a more realistic place. Being comfortable for a woman involves two things: first of all, she has to be physically comfortable. That might mean she isn’t going to feel too happy if you ask her to put her ankles behind her ears while you have sex. It might also mean that you have to avoid any position that gives you the deepest penetration, since your penis might bang her cervix and give her some serious discomfort. Second, she has to emotionally comfortable.So if you treat her like one of those porn stars, she isn’t going to be too happy either, and you’re not likely to be invited back to bed. This includes: wanting to ejaculate over her without her whole-hearted agreement, using dirty talk that is disrespectful to her, wanting to slap her butt if she isn’t into it, and generally treating her like a sex
object rather than a person. Second Sex Position Mistake: Being too much of a gentleman. There’s an old saying: “A gentleman takes his weight on his arms.” If you think this is the best way to behave during sex in the man on top position, did you ever try asking your partner what she wants? A lot of women like to feel the weight of their man on top of them during sex – they say things like: it makes them feel safe, secure, loved, or that they just like to feel the energy and power of their man in this position. Sure, if you’re a lot heavier than she is, you might squash her, so exercise some judgement, but generally, in the man on top position, let her feel your weight!
Third Sex Position Mistake: Don’t just lie there all the time when she’s having fun. If she’s on top, riding you, remember that you can still move during sex in this position, even if it’s only a little bit. You can thrust your hips to match her movements, raise your knees to alter the angle at which your penis enters her vagina, and caress her breasts and clitoris if she’s facing you while you have sex. Remember – you don’t like it if she lies motionless during man on top sex, so in this position, return the favour and move about yourself!
Fourth Sex Position Mistake: Being too aggressive during sex. Sure, some women like rough sex, either all the time or once in a while, but for a woman, sex tends to be something special and she’d like you to treat it that way too! That means not pumping away aggressively without her encouragement, not being selfish (i.e. having an orgasm yourself but not bothering to make sure she has one too), and not moving her around roughly during sex. If you want to show how much of a man you are by being a bit dominant, do it with firmness and kindness, rather than flinging her around the bed like a rag doll. Needless to say, this advice applies whatever sex position you are using!
Fifth Sex Position Mistake: Sticking to the same old sex positions every time you make love. Sure, you don’t have to try all the adventurous and challenging positions you can find on the internet, but a bit of variation really adds spice to your sex life. Even if you’re extremely fond of the man on top position, for example, sex in the rear entry or side by side positions will let you see things very differently, may well get you much more aroused, and will certainly give you both some different sensations!
About the Author:
Rod Phillips is an online counselor and sexual therapist at The Best Guide to Sex Positions